games for the young

growing up, i remember playing a lot of random things. i mean, sure, i'm not so old as to not have had computer games or have played all the canonical 'proper' sports during my childhood, like basketball, softball and football (or soccer to you silly americans. pertaining which, european football actually uses your feet most of the time. and american football... yeah mostly with your hands. what's up with that? nomenclature fail. just a personal beef of mine.)

i'm not going to say kids nowadays are spoiled and are missing out on the opportunity to play all those crazy games we used to play, like 'baling selipar jepun', 'galah panjang' or 'caping / coping' (sp?). every so often, i'll see some kids playing it, during my visits home. but you gotta say, that's not the norm anymore. so following are some ideas to revamp some age-old games to make them more exciting and relevant in this age of quick thrills, violence, sex and ridiculously-short attention spans.

'baling batu bata jepun'. think of it as extreme 'selipar jepun'. the rules are the same, except substitute your flip-flops for bricks. i remember when we were younger, finding optimal flip-flops was really hard. the more financially-abled amongst us would actually go find the best ones at the night-market because it would give their teams that extra edge when trying to rebuild the flip-flop tripod / tetrapod. but now that i think of it, we always had some renovations / houses being built around the neigbourhood, and bricks were never in short supply. they're pretty standard and are ergonomically designed for building sh*t. how much more convenient can it get? the only downside is if you happen to be playing the 'freeze' version, where you have to stop all actions if you get hit with the flip-flops (or brick). shouldn't have to complicate a game where knocking a friend into the next world is a real possibility, by introducing the ambiguity of them actually just playing dead.

'caping berapi an-nar'. which is to be pronounced "tʃæp.p'ing". and is to mean roughly 'mini-dodgeball (with the fiery wraths from hell)'. the game, for the uninitiated, is simple enough. it's like dodgeball, except instead of some huge-ass netball, you use an easier-to-find tennis ball. also, there's pretty much no limitation as to how you can dodge / hide from the thrower, and there's no boundaries (the small court for dodgeball is for sissies). you play the game without score (most of the time) and it's just all out slinging that tennis ball at your friends / hated enemies until it's dusk and everyone has to head home. needless to say, if you're the one throwing the ball, and you throw it into someone's face so hard, it knocks their brains back into 2nd grade, then... hillarity ensues. oh, and stay as far away as possible from the victim because if he gets the ball before you do, you're sh*t out of luck. anyway, i remember playing this, and especially the elder amongst us (which is to mean they were bigger or older by a year or two) would figure out that the scrawny ones couldn't throw a tennis ball to save their lives. so, they'd just go closer to the ones who can't throw harder than little-bo-peep, maybe dodge the ball at the last second (or just take the feeble attempt and laugh), pick up the ball and WHAM TO THE FACE. needless to say, the tennis ball, in the hands of the weak, wasn't something to be feared. hence the reason why we should douse it beforehand in oil and set it ablaze. just be sure you play in an area where houses (and kids) are insured against arson / fire damage. or you could just wear fire resistance gear and resist most of the incoming dot component.

'galah panjang dan tajam'. i never really got why it was named 'galah'. isn't that some kind of long stick you use to get fruits down from trees with? or is there some second meaning that i'm unaware of? anyway, getting 'caught' in this game only entails free hugs from a friend... which isn't really that competitive nor is it scary. unless, at that tender, young age, you find out that one of your friends is sexually inclined towards the same gender. in which case, although there is no homophobia in this blog, could lead to some awkward situations.

1: er dude, yeah you caught me, and i'm out. you can stop hugging now.
2: just a little longer. your skin is so soft. and the smell of your hair is divine.
1: mkayyyy.... dude, wtf. are you having an erection?
2: shhhhh. love is a beautiful thing. think of it as happiness in my pants.

i digress. anyway, even though i'm all for the touchy-feely stuff, we need to man it up in this thang. and by that, i mean using katanas, broadswords and various bladed objects. now, i know it's not very feasible to ask kids to purchase such things, so i guess the kitchen knife (or two) will do. maybe a switchblade. anyway, instead of hugging someone to tag him out, you could be extending your arms, holding said sharp objects. and swishing them around. man, i'd like to see you run past that sh*t. add in some random flailing and we can be sure to stab someone's eye out, or better still, go straight for the jugular. and mom taught you never to run with scissors, pft.