Tuesday 2 March 2010

hindsight is 20/20


many years ago, when i was traveling in egypt, i had the unprecedented pleasure of meeting the acquaintance of some horrible bowel disease. back then, being the uninterested person i am sure everyone else is, on infectious diseases, i never gave it much thought. that, coupled with the fact that i was puking my guts out and shitting super-fluid diarrhoea. shit's nasty. but that's not the end of it. in fact, contracting the bug was pretty much the mere beginning. on the next day, i was to catch the flight back home, and i can attest to the shittiness of being in a confined space for 10 hours, and having to frequent the toilet every 3.29 minutes, if only to stare at my red-eyed reflection and convince myself that i am yet alive.

but, enough of the past, i am sure nobody is really interested in the graphic version of my illness (which involves green vomit, riddled with black specks [highly concentrated bile with activated charcoal pellets]. also, stomach cramps with pain i can only imagine rivals period cramps [for the female readers who think a man cannot empathise with this, you may have valid reason, but i stand by my simile]. etc etc).

in today's lectures we were hearing all about interesting protozoa, and their ability to host bacteria. a sudden epiphany came upon me as i sat dozing off in the air-conditioned lecture hall: i had a very distinct recollection of, on the day of contracting the bug, eating ice cream, bought in a dodgy alley. although the ice cream itself seemed very innocent (which i cannot say for the semi-paedophilic seller. but that's another story for another day), i also remember a drop of 'rain' dressing my ice cream (vanilla flavour, not really my favourite, but ice cream is ice cream). and i put two and two together (to give five) in this instant, my hyperactively imaginative memory now also recalling that there was an air-conditioning vent above me as i was licking that ice cream, wondering where the rain had come from in the summer of a cloudless-skied egypt. yes, it all makes sense now.

damn you, legionella.

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